Rattle the nest of ashes

Nearly 4 months of inactivity on this blog. Well, yea, when you don’t spend the effort to do something, present becomes history very much faster than it shld be.

But well, I’m back today, for a little walk down memory lane.

In my very first post, I mentioned something about tagging Phoenix on the post but not mentioning anything about it. This is where I am going to dig up history.

This mythical animal has always been a fascinating creature to me. And the connection to it has always felt warm. With its radiating elemental energy of Fire, it just feel so re-energizing.

Quoted from controverscial.com, “Symbolizing immortality, reincarnation and eternal light, the Phoenix brings with it a desire for change – a desire to reach for the stars.”

Back in 2006, I started blogging on Blogger, adopting the spirit of a Phoenix to empower the attitude of my journey of life. Life, inevitably, has its ups and downs. And as you know, some of the downs can be very devastating. So these down times were the points where I fall hard, when the Phoenix dies. But when I do rise again, you can be sure that I’ll come back at life’s challenges with renewed strength and unwavering determination. The young fiery bird will not be trifled with and when it spreads its wings of fires to fly out of its ashy nest, its flames will burn strong and bright.

That lasted many years. The strength it gave me to keep me going was amazing. Fall after fall, I bounced back and fight on relentlessly. Determined and more resolved to make things happen each time I fail at it.

But when I moved on, when I migrated over here to WordPress, or actually rather, before I migrated, I decided to put this great friend to rest. I wanted to be myself. My own identity. TJCD. Dennis Tan. Whatever it is. And so I moved out and away.

The only irony is that nearly a year into this new blog, I have not forged my own identity. I am still lost. I don’t know what’s…me. So much of it, has played a part in defining who I am. And by shedding up this dear friend in the deep woods, it felt cold, tougher and distant. And I miss it, all of it. The excitement, the powering up, the fury and more..

Seems to me the closure was a mistake. And no other totem can better illustrate the values, the ideals, the attitude, the hope, the radiating strength to keep going.

The way I look at it, perhaps, it’s time to pay a visit to this old friend…
And rattle its nest of ashes…

…stay tuned